In these days of isolation you are slowly regressing back to your primal instincts, solely because you hardly care about what you look like or what someone thinks of you. You are regressing to your primal self, which is a good-ish thing.. yeap, I said good-ish, thanks Kenya Barris.
Anyway, before or even after doesn’t really matter be sure to read part one of this strangest but oddly satisfying things we do. On this list I catch upon the most primal behaviors/action we do that satisfy us mara we don’t want to admit it; why? Well because society has deemed it disgusting and not SEXy. Sit down, and probably do some of the things in here unknowingly until you read and see yourself react.
1. Scratching an itch
That krwam krwam sound, you know what I mean…that hll hll hll as you scratch that itch in your bum or thigh or where ever…it has that satisfying feel to it.
Ever notice how horrible it feels to not scratch an itch. As R. Kelly once said “My mind is telling me Nooo, but my body!!”
That quote fits perfectly in this moment right? Come on admit it. Anyhow, that sound of you scratching can come off as annoying to others but you and your body know that it’s heavily sent.
So fuck them.
2. Farting alone
Ever farted and it smelt so bad, and you tell yourself “Thank heavens no one is here because God damn!”
Why you acting like you don’t fart? This is the oddest satisfying thing to do admit it. You busy studying and you feel that fart in there, and you like lift your bum half way, and like Beyblade, you let it rip!!
After that you kinda feel good and free. Don’t quote me on this but I read once that if you fart while you’re sleepy under your blanket, you get the best sleep ever. Fart acts like chloroform, knocks you out…boom!
When you fart alone, you kinda have a grin afterwards too. Be like yeah, I did that shit! Pun not intended.
3. Lying on the phone, about where you are.
“No, I am like 5 minutes away”
meanwhile you’re still brushing your teeth. If you were charged money for every lie you told over the phone, yeah, you’d be that broke.
We all do it. It just comes naturally, and sometimes it’s not necessary but we can’t help ourselves.
The question then is, why is it satisfying? Is it satisfying? Deep down this lie is satisfying. Why? Because it not only makes you feel better about being late but you hope it makes the other person calm too.
Which it fucking never does!!! I use the statement “I’m patient but I hate waiting”
I remember I’d wait for someone who I had told 10-15 minutes to get out cause I am close, when I get there, she’d still not be out, and I wait for 10 minutes more. I would want to strangle her.
It’s easy to lie over the phone. It’s a white lie, no harm, most satisfying.
4. Digging that booger out.
OMG that is so disgusting!! Is it though? Yes, publicly it is euuueeew!! But alone; it is mostly of satisfaction.
Groping around that nose, digging for that booger is a satisfying task. Once you have it, you look at that bastard, telling yourself, I got you bitch. Then you play finger basketball with it. Throwing it somewhere; then going back to dig for the gold again.
You won’t like what I am about to say…so, stop reading for a bit. Some people go as further as tasting that booger.
OMG!! WTF! Well, as an adult you can say that, but as a kid. Your mom/dad/gran/guardian… I want to be fair…some of us had Usain Bolts as parents.
These people in your life, can tell you, you ate the chips out of your booger.
5. Biting/Nibbling the inside of your mouth
Okay, I must admit, I am adding this one cause I do it randomly, and I find joy in it. The inside of one’s mouth is quite soft and kinda tasty.
This is a random fact: I read inside of one’s mouth is cuddling or soft as the vagina. Fucked up fact I know. #laughing_emoji
Anyway, I sometimes gracefully nibble the inside of my mouth for no reason; okay, sometimes when I am thinking.
So, there you have it my friends; oddly satisfying things we get up to, and probably doing a lot during this quarantine
#6 Biting your nails
Some find this act vile and disgusting, honestly at some moments it is, but sometimes it really helps you think you know. You could be bored or some shit like that and the nails are right there…so you nibble, it’s human nature.
There are nail clippers? Uhmm what if you don’t have any? Gotta bite those suckers. What??? It’s my fingernails… Where did it hurt you? Nowhere? Good then fuck off.
It is rather satisfying to bite them nails sometimes, I mean, honestly.
Let’s all behave ourselves, take care of ourselves. If this is not the best time to understand who you are and what makes you…YOU. I don’t know what is..