Just an ‘Apple”

One of the first theatre (drama) works I saw had this character, a teacher; He had this apple, he never ate it. For the whole time he’d keep wiping the apple until it would shine. That apple looked perfect, but we never knew how it was inside.

I hated that he never ate that Apple, I love apples.

Years when I was a little older I understood why he never ate it. The Apple represented him. He liked the idea of looking perfect, he was in the eyes of everyone a perfect teacher, but he was a vile man.

Sometimes people can be like that; All you get to see is the perfect shining outside, yet inside they are either vile or worse, hurt, crying for help, for someone to just give them a hug once in a while.

Yeah, kinda deep for an art work made by 14 year olds. Give a friend or stranger a hug day

Whose nudes are these?

Nudes, probably an art form that has been done for years and we only appreciate its beauty now. I mean have you seen some of the old paintings? Those are basically nudes just that no cameras ‘existed’

I am here again with my intellectual bullshit to talk about nudes. Why send nudes? I mean why not? What is to be answered… the ultimate question of all these questions is this.. after we break up should all the nudes I have of you be deleted? Ooohhhh interesting question, I know.

When my friends read this, they will definitely complain, they said I am too sexual or rather I like sexual topics, well bitches, I am a “sexually” curious person.

Who can send nudes? Uhmm I can answer this with my eyes closed, anyone can send nudes to anyone, I mean, if you want me to appreciate what your momma gave or rather workout gave you then by all means share with me, I will appreciate with a thank you filled with heart emojis/thirsty drooling ones whichever ones that will make you feel good and send more nudes in the future.

I have received numerous nudes in my lifetime, lately it’s been dry though, huge sigh of disappointment, I don’t think I’ve made new friends yet who are willing to send me nudes for appreciation; which leads me next to the second questions.

Why send nudes? what possible reason exists for someone to send another person a nude? Firstly let me be honest, there is absolutely no reason to send a nude, especially if we are fucking already or will do it or want to do it; however as much as there is no reason to send one there are many reasons to send one or two, or a couple more

Nudes done right create this thrill, this excitement within not only the receiver but the taker of the nude. I don’t know about you but I’ve received nudes that made me want the person who sent me in bed right in that moment; I’ve received nudes that made my penis want to climb out my pants to have a little peak themselves, of course I had to say come down boy, this one is for my eyes.

Nudes are like an appetizer before the main course, like an advertisement, a sample, and you know how some samples can be, there make you want to buy the whole god damn thing. Finally nudes can act as foreplay depending on the reasons why one was sent; there are nudes you get because the person just wants to ask you how they look, yeah, those actually exist, from close friends, a friend who just writes “what you think?” and I look at the nude and reply “not bad, have you been working your ass out” but from a lover or a person of interest, a nude is the kiss/bj for the eyes… look at all this, just for you…

How does one take a nude? Oh boy! oh dear me!

Now to be fair, when it comes to bodies, female bodies have been more sexualized than male bodies, which is why when it comes to nudes female ones are more appreciated than males. However times have vastly changed, men’s bodies come with great appreciation depending on the circumstances.

So with that in regards, men don’t really know how to take nudes; I see memes even making a joke about it, when a guy sends a nude, it’s usually of his erect penis; In his mind what the receiver will appreciate is the size of his dick… but nudes are more than just about genitals, there is a rather artistic factor in it as shortly explained earlier.

The receiver usually wants to see the whole package, the genitals should be saved as a mystery really, should never be the main focus of the nude… ‘the skin, the muscle, the ass, the boobs, the six pack/belly, neck, hands, legs/thighs but never, I repeat never the face. I will explain why on the last question.

I am not a judge no executioner on nudity and dirtiness, people can really send their partners whatever they want, but I am stating a point of view.

My final addition to nudes is this; “relationships” end, no matter how strong the love can be or whatever, “relationships” tend to reach some type of expiry date, I have relationships in quotes because I am speaking about all forms of relationships. When relationships end people tend to get bitter, some angry, others feel regret, and others appreciation but nonetheless, you’ve given yourself to this person who is no longer in your life, the one thing you’ll regret is having sent that person nudes with your face on them.

Some people can be childish, it’s true; No matter how much you trust someone, it’s important to reserve 1% for doubt, just to be safe. You don’t want your nude photos to ‘leak’ out or worse be used against you some day.

This makes me arrive at the most important question of all, whose nudes are these? After our relationship ends and I have all these nudes you had sent me, some with faces, should I delete them?

I asked a friend Sabelo and this is he said..

“They are yours 100%. Gifts that were bought during the ‘relationship’ don’t go back to the one who bought em.

If you buy me a gift. Automatically you are giving sole custody of the gift. Whether I sell it, misuse it, keep it, pass it to someone. I have that right. Its mine not ours”

I agree, the nudes although have your body, they belong to me, no one returns a gift; with understanding of course that I will not do no harm. Nude testament

So, let’s all take a breather, let’s all appreciate this beautiful art called Nudes, sink deep into it, soak it, warm into it, stroke to it and indulge in it.

What is your take on nudes, I’d love to hear.

You probably read this before, maybe

You probably read this before and you are wondering what happened to this guy that he feels this way? Well I am not sure either

I feel as though I had forgotten what it’s like to feel something, to feel emotions beyond your own control for someone or something. Emotions that are not guided by your “sexual” desires first or desires to mingle, but emotions that unexpectedly hit you, and you find yourself… gasping.

In this world, a world that is socially ‘destructive’, people searching for momentarily fixes or hits or whatever, which is not entirely bad… how do you sift through all that nonsense and indulge in authentic moments?

Of course one way to find true authentic moments is to hang around people who resonate in the same frequency as you, it doesn’t have to be identical, but the along the same line; For me that would be art. I think people who have creative minds have a better understanding of me than those who only try to understand art. Yes, there are those that enjoy art but it’s not the same as the ones inside it.

No, I’m not saying people should find each other in their own circles, that’s a terrible suggestion, it would ruin the philosophy of opposites attract, but I am saying, the people in your circle connect with you on such a level that there are no words in the dictionary to explain it.

I am a believer in connection, even though I have been amongst the mass of humans who follow their sexual desires and other “curious” desires; I am a believer in vibrating so well with another human that when they vanish out your life, it damn hurts.

It’s a question I have been asking though, how does one find such a needle in this social haystack? This haystack of people who are still trying to piece together who they are, and might end up using you to figure some part about themselves.

Listen, I am not in the slight bit innocent myself, I think there are a certain number of corpses I might have walked over to try and figure myself out. I regret of course on how I made those people feel, but I am not certain I regret everything entirely since without the actions I did previously, I wouldn’t be who I am today.

That is a weird and dangerous statement isn’t it, but the truth in it is overwhelming.

The reason to have regrets is because the actions you did have changed how you see things.

Anyway, I don’t even know how I got here. My sincere aim was to talk about connection: where does one find it? Honestly, I don’t know. Some people are lucky to turn on that TV and boom their favorite type of TV show comes on, and others have to flip through a lot of channels until they discover what their taste is… and that’s basically what this thing can be like sometimes, but, you know the type of genre you are looking for, so flip through around that area, and who knows you might meet a stranger that gives you a feeling a dictionary can’t explain.

Chemistry

How does a person explain this feeling? This phenomenal chemical reaction, and no, I’m not talking about laboratory chemistry; I’m talking about the chemistry that happens between two humans, two people, individuals who might be strangers or might not be strangers, well given that we all start as strangers

However what about instant chemistry? What that chemistry that shoots up like morphine into your system and drives you wild; Does morphine do that or it makes you numb? Good feelings all around

This is what I want to talk about in this writing. Simply writing about it won’t do though.. so read in between these words and create your own idea of what I feel when I feel chemistry.

~Chemical reaction

I have been involved in a lot of experiments in my life, none have been more interesting than the chemical reaction that happens when ART is the laboratory.

Art is the hand that rubs the lamp, what comes out is something only wishes can be made off.

Remember I am talking about you

Our chemistry is like water slowly building up from our feet, to our knees, rising up and then we drown in it. We drown in it but we can still breathe, we breathe through touch and through this feeling… this feeling.

I remember clearly dancing with you; it’s like having sex on the dance floor with our clothes still on. I want to stay close to you a little bit longer, I want to grab your hand a little bit longer til I am holding on to you by my one finger. At the PRESENT, I’m talking about you.

Chemistry is like poison, the one that kills you slowly. The poison that infects the air, so you don’t even realize that you are inhaling death.

Chemistry can be a beautiful illusion, but my god a wonderful trick it is…it keeps me floating, I can’t really feel the ground.

I want to touch you all over, not physically, but just breathe around your skin. I want to dance with the energy you

Close your eyes.

Imagine me and you.

All the things we could do.

Only when the time is right.

Chemistry is what you and I have, and I want to make it an adventure and explore it, after that I will write a map on both our skins so we don’t ever forget it.

But if you ever forget I,
Just imagine
Imagine you and I/ don’t laugh that feeling is real/
Your attraction, I thought it heals… but now I’m in too deep, I/
Like death it reels me in deep, I/
Instantly I combust, don’t ask, with you I’m clear as crystal, but convoluted by your touch, I/
You and I,
We Walt and Chemistry/
Deadly combo Heisenberg

If you didn’t get that, damn you bitch, if you did then hell yeah bitch! I am really going to be high on you, and already I think I’m addicted.

I want to know from you, whoever is reading, what chemistry is like to you?

Resume for a relationship

To be honest sometimes being “single” is a great option, it saves you the hassle of having to undress yourself again and again; In this scenario undress means both literal and figurative. To try and begin a relationship is slowly becoming annoying, especially as a person who knows who they are; I know I am interesting, and can be interesting to most people, but it’s hard to show that in a few lines of conversations. I feel tired about it, I still want to mingle with people, women to be specific, but I’m tired of all these questions, were sometimes the answers don’t really say anything about who I really am.

So on that note, I decided to write something silly but serious; a resume for “relationships”. Which strange enough might actually be a thing. Relationships is in quotation marks because we are adults people, some relationships are really for intimate reasons. My resume might mix words and poetic writing together.

Grey is an unsure color, just like me. I am unsure if I still want play the “I wanna get to know you game”

No really, I’m tired of having to say what my favorite color is; It’s grey, so before you try to mingle with me please read this. If you found me online, depending where online, no that’s not my real name; online I’m like a product, I have to sell both truth and lies, I decided lying about my name is the easiest lie.

I like sports, physical sports, all types of sports, except rugby, I don’t get it and basketball, I like the anime versions. I love people but I hate social gatherings, there make me revert back to my really shy self; Oh yeah, I’m shy but not really shy.

I hate being in closed social spaces; I’m more of an adventurer… I get curious a lot but not curious enough to drink alcohol or do drugs but curious enough to make out with a stranger that has a great smile.

Yeah, I’m a good kisser… at 96% of times

I like to laugh and make people laugh, although recently I have realized a few things really hardly make me laugh now.. everything is so serious!!

I’m not online much, I don’t know why. I love sex, I’m good at it too; however I like conversations, I have a lot of nonsense to talk about… but you gotta talk too, I’m not a comic.

I’m an artist. I love art. Performance arts to be exact. I think performance arts exist everywhere really. We are pieces of performance work

The real reason I am writing this, is really I’m tired of having to say my favorite color all the time I try to get to know someone. I hate questions, I prefer knowing a person just by conversation. Just tell me any nonsense about yourself and I will put my ear on the table and indulge, and tell you about my nonsense, that way it will feel like we know each other than being strangers interviewing each other for a certain relationship.

Depending on what type of person you are, I’m totally boring, especially if you’re not patient; unfortunately these days I don’t think anyone is patient. I want to think I am like a sling shot that you pull back, the build will yield much better result. I like the process more than I like the results, I always say that even when I make theatre work, maybe same with relationships.

I honestly don’t think I am funny, but somehow I seem to have the ability to make people laugh, it’s really strange. I love ice cream, I think Ice cream dates are the best; When eating/licking ice cream with someone and talking it sort of makes you feel like a kid inside. I like that feeling, because it’s always there.

I think people are more free now but it’s scary because it makes us not sure about what people’s intentions are; either you’re not sure about what you want and other people are not sure or you’re not sure, if you know what the other person wants.

Honestly I don’t think I know either that’s why I prefer process over products, the process makes me see clear what can work and what will fail and how to amend.

The art of feeling regret

We have all been in a situation of regret, I bet you more than once. It occurs mostly when you are still figuring out; 1) who you are? 2) What opinions matter to you? 3) Whose opinion matters to you?

I mean I am sure it can go beyond these three points I just wrote but for this writing let’s consider these points pivotal or rather as the base. I truly have had regrets in my lifetime, whether it was having told a lie or having not being truly honest with how I felt. These two points are very much not the same. One point reflects my actions against others while the other reflects a reaction felt by self.

However these regrets, especially ones of my actions to others, began to fade away. My regrets began to fully encapsulate the latter; my reaction to self. I began to live on the motto ‘Honesty is the best policy’. Yes, of course, there were many times were I was crucified for living under that motto but I figured out something that is still going to take my fellow humans a while to understand.

We simply cannot live a life were we hinder our true honesty just to fulfill the desires of other people. When we do that, which we often do, we are living under a lie and soon enough these lies begin to build a home in you.

In one of Dave Chappelle’s special he uses these words: “As a policy I never feel bad about anything I say up here”. He has no regrets about anything he says while up on the stage.

The stage provides a platform for him to truly exuberate his honesty about everything. If he ever regrets the things he says on that stage, he is no longer himself.

What is my point? My point is perhaps we should all be constantly on stage like Dave Chappelle. Do things or speak out our thoughts and have no regrets about them, no matter how brutal in honesty the words may have swam. Yes of course we can consider the three base points that I made, number 1 being the most crucial, and others, really there is room for flexibility, haibo thixo!

People I am tired of living a could’ve/should’ve life; that life is draining.

Sidenote: Ever had that I should have kissed her/him moment? The worst right.

They say don’t listen to your first instinct; Psychologists can be wrong too. Your first instinct no matter how bad it may be is still the most honest you that you will ever be.

What made me write this? Well, as I shared in my last writing. I recently signed up for online dating; my friends although argue that Tinder is not for dating but for the latter. Shut up guys! Anyway you get into this thing and you wonder if it’s best to be yourself or to design an avatar of yourself that will fit the role.

Role: To get partners of course duh!

I made the error of tying to fit myself and an avatar together. These two personalities ended up clashing. There I was having matched with an individual I found interesting but “keeping it cool” led me astray. I wanted to speak my own way however I fell into a trap, by the time I was awakening from it, I had lost. It’s only afterwards that I wondered why wasn’t I just myself; If she don’t like me well that’s her choice

There’s a lot of interesting people that challenge you in different. That’s mostly what interests me, the meeting of these individuals who’ve lived life differently.

This brings me back to the art of regret. Morality allows us to be sensitive and understanding towards others but, yes there is a but, we need to begin a journey of selfishness; A journey that let’s you exuberate all your honesty and let people react to it; they must fucking know who they are dealing with. This thing of hiding behind avatars must stop man.

It’s like a person who keeps making excuses when they don’t want to say no; I don’t want to help you or I don’t like you. It hurts for the receiver but you were being honest.

The best example for the type of individual I am referring to is Larry Davids in Curb Your enthusiasm.

I really appreciate honesty; for a while I might feel horrible, which is won’t lie it hardly happens. I am one of those people who believe if something wasn’t meant to be, it won’t happen.

What intellectual bullshit do you want to add?

Senses

I have been thinking about my senses lately; the things I’ve experienced through my senses. I don’t think these writings are complete but they give off a certain idea about the stupid things I let my senses indulge in. I think in future to get to know someone, I will surely ask them their fav senses, and I hope after you read you can share what intrigues your senses too. Make coffee or smoothie or whatever drives your fancy.

1.Decibel

The unit of Sound is decibel. I learnt that in high school.

Sound is everywhere even in silence.There is sound. Even when you close your ears and eyes as tight as you can, you can still hear sound.

In sleep there’s still sound in my dreams. I am in love with different noises and sounds.

I love the sound the drain makes when it’s sucking up the last bit of water; it turns into a vacuum.

The sound of cash as it ripples through the ATM, who doesn’t love that. I love the sound of old music, it has the ability to awaken memories, moments that can’t repeat.

The sound of argument amongst the gents in the hood. Always makes me shake my head in laughter.

I love the sound of air when I am on a bicycle with my eyes closed; it makes me feel like I am flying, if not in a movie.

I love the sound of cracking bones or loosening of muscle when I stretch out. It always feels like my body is breathing.

Yes, I love the sound of old Asian movies, it makes me feel like a young kid waiting to go outside and attempt all those tricks.

I grew up too quickly really.

I love sound, I love noise. I love the noise that occurs during sex. I do, the sound of oooh and ahhh coming from my partner. Pun intended.

There is sound and hearing it makes me feel alive.The sound of pouring rain on my roof at home, it calms me; then the leaking sound that randomly hits face, brings me back to reality.

Then finally, if there’s ever such a thing; my love and hate for the sound of applause. I love giving off that sound but hate receiving it; it always makes me feel weird inside.

Wouldn’t the world be better if we began to listen more than we talked.

2. Sight

The moon shines so brightly; I could stare at it for hours on end, just as I would stare at you.

There are things that bring joy to my eyes. My sister’s face is one of those things. She doesn’t have to speak nor smile, her face is priceless.

Watching bodies dance. There is something about movement that enchants me. It pauses me. I imagine myself in there moving too.

I am attracted to smiles, real smiles that causes wrinkles around the eyes. I’d marry a girl who has a great smile and forever make her smile.

Animation, cartoons. What a sight to see; there’s something about watching these dumb illustrated objects. It brings peace into my old heart.

The sky; the sky is like a clean page where anything can be written. With my eyes I write every fantasy I can think of; I love watching the pale blue sky.

3. Olfactory

There is a certain smell that you produce during sex; it entices me like a moth to light. Science says we produce these sexual hormones that cause attraction. If it’s true, I want to stay in your skin.

After the rain stops, there is that smell that hits at the back of my nose. I want to indulge in it.

Paper, newspaper and that smell from a newly bought novel. That’s the first thing I always do when I get a book; smell all the content in it. So dumb.

Uncle Rajah. Rajah makes me remember watching my mom cook; that smell puts a smile on my face.

I hate coffee, but the smell of it opens up my nostrils like a dog that has smelt smuggled cocaine.

Vaseline, the original body cream, I use to hate it too. My aunt rubbed it on my skin so much I knew I’d be baking in the sun.

Come take a look at this grass Eddie Murphy said… the smell of grass after a trim.

There’s a flood of old memories again playing in my head so quick it’s a marvel film introduction.

The ocean breeze, I can’t swim but I can smell the air the ocean throws towards the shore.

4. Taste

The things I have tasted are not enough, my well is still empty; like a travelling chef I want to taste every meal from every culture.

Taste is never ending; I love the taste of skin. I bite the soft bits of my own skin, if not the one I am sexing. I love to nibble just a bit on skin not with teeth but with the flesh part of my mouth.

There is another part of the skin I enjoy the taste of, it hides in between your legs. This line has been a repeat, it assures me that I love being intertwined, in flesh were bodies are in heat together.

Apples. I have nothing more to say than the name itself. Apples.

Bacon… ahh Bacon an insult to my health, an indulgence for my tongue.

So many things I love to taste, so let me rather write about those that I hate.

I hate the taste of onion. It makes me sick. I mean that literally. If giving up was a taste it would be number one, since it isn’t I hate the taste of earwax. Shut up you’ve accidentally tasted it too.

Taste of badly burnt food, it reminds me of my failure. The taste of ink, yeah, I’ve accidentally had that too

5. Touch

I could never write poetry as good as my favorite writers. They could paint words in the ocean; mine can’t even swim in a pool.

So I decided to write my own words; words that I could laugh at when I read them out loud.

I love the feel of a baby’s tiny hand when it wraps around my finger. It makes me all cute inside.

When I was young we use to clean chicken feet with hot water. After that chicken foot was naked, I’d lay my cheek against it. I love the touch of chicken feet on the cheek. It’s so tender.

Just like nipples our heads have these multiple nerve endings. I love the sensation that I get during a head rub, only when I am lying on top of soft breasts and a beating heart.

Touch. Tender. The pecking and intertwining of lips. I love to kiss, maybe I got too many kisses when I was young, so now I have a curse for yearning to kiss soft lips.

Rain. Rain on my skin. The feeling of rain leaves me happy. Just as hearing it leaves me feeling calm.

I am not ticklish, except on the sides of my body; I discovered this when I was young. No, I’m not a virgin, just ticklish on one place.

The feeling of the dance floor as it plays with my skin. I love the conversations that the floor and I have… the possibilities, the discovery and injuries.

If there could be one last thing, I love the feeling of hand holding. There is a just something about it

There’s probably billion of grammatical errors, I apologize. As Dave Chappelle once said if you’re standing too close to the elephant, all you see is it’s penis like skin.

Why we all should apply for jobs we don’t qualify for?

It’s easy and probably honest to make the statement that they are people who are in jobs they don’t qualify for; a lot of various factors go it explaining how. It could be due to corruption or nepotism, good looks, race etc. It’s not all bad really because some people are there because they took an opportunity, others started an opportunity.

Before I go far, let me clear one thing on the side. We can’t all go into starting our own businesses, not that it’s impossible, but frankly some of us are not built as leaders; being a leader who can manage people takes something that most people don’t have; some people thrive better as followers and that’s okay, don’t judge; appreciate that skill and ability.

Now that is out the way, let’s get to the main topic; why we should all apply for jobs we don’t really qualify for?

I can’t really prove the next statement what I can say is I am making it as an artist. It’s no more in the arts that there is an existence of people who don’t really qualify to be there… please don’t take the words ‘qualify’ literal. I for one have worked with hundreds if not thousands of people, and I truly understand the existence of natural ability when it comes to arts, especially performance arts; individuals who just get it and they are great at it.

Qualify for the Arts means people who don’t necessarily work hard to be there, individuals who are there because as explained earlier they knew someone or they are just pretty. Guys let’s never escape that truth… some people are in there because they look beautiful. It’s okay, well maybe.

In the arts we have people with law degrees, science, biology, psychology etc etc. Then you have the artist who put a whole lot of years in the craft doing who knows what… well I have something to say to my fellow artists.. get the fuck up and apply for a marketing job, science anything really, you’re an actor, a performer…

Okay let me clear that out in better language.

I don’t know how many times I’ve been in a position I didn’t necessarily belong in; I have been in politics, and was in favor to be a leader in the field and I don’t even like politics; the people in there however loved me.

I have worked at a bank, sort of, yes, I am an artist; and I’ve been in various types of marketing jobs. None of these jobs I qualify for, what I did was, there was an advertisement and I applied, I told them what I am good at and how it fits to what they are looking for.

It’s strange isn’t it, not really, people admire and are attracted to those with the right energy, people who know what they really want; it’s an attractive facet to have, I certainly find it attractive, even in women.

My friend, Mlondi in desperate times, desperate adventurous times really; He once applied to be a maths tutor, the man knows nothing about maths really, he said so himself, however he was willing to learn along the way.

There he was in front of maths board members having been selected as an interview candidate. My friend tells me he sat there convincing these guys that he was the guy they were looking for, that he has been tutoring for years now, he understands the workings of it all, the system of learning. He told no lies, all he was doing was hype his ability, and use the right energy.

The board members laughed, they deliberated, they were all in agreement that this man was the right guy for the job.

Of course he wasn’t taken, however not because of lack of trying. Just politics.

Sounds like motivational bullshit doesn’t it? Well it does, but it is as truthful as it can be. There are not many jobs out there, but perhaps there are, it’s just you don’t think you belong in it; either you believe it’s below you or above you. You have to understand your ability.

I’ve taken jobs were I was in a hot costume, had to run the whole day during comrades marathon giving strangers hi 5s…tell you what, one of the best jobs I’ve ever had. After a while in that job I got promoted.

My friend Sanele who has a drama degree was a bank consultant, can you believe that? I trust this man, but not with my money?? I can tell you that never!!! Yet he worked to convince people that their money was save with him and good at it too, bravo arts

My point is, if their looking for a PHD, convince them why you with a high school certificate are much better suited for the job. If their looking for a science guy, convince them that with your drama dance degree you can be a better suite for the position.

It’s far fetched I know, not all positions you will get really. However here is what you will get, a response that tells you how to be better, a response that can offer you a difference position because damn you know your way with words etc.

As always I am on my intellectual bullshit, but you know what? it’s gotten me pretty, pretty, pretty far

What the HOMI BHABHA?!

I remember the year was 2011, if I recall correctly only 3 people out of a class of about 50 students were able to pass the Homi Bhabha essay.

Excuse my next unintelligent writing for a second

“what the actual fuck Homi Bhabha?! What English are you writing? “

I felt very dumb at that time, to be honest, I doubt I still understand anything Homi Bhabha writes; my relationship with his writing doesn’t exist. However, my point is not clouded, not all writing is Bhabha writing, there are certainly worse writing, worse meaning more complicated and there are easier ones, however if you pick up most academic writings it’s not for the common wo/man.

I don’t know about you but I speak Human English, academic writing on the other hand hates human English; You put academic writing and human English in one room, one of them will be pissed off, academic English goes on dates with Shakespeare English.

To be an academic writer is very frustrating and straining most times. As Bill Blurr says It’s like going to the cinema to watch an end of the world movie (World War Z or Planet of the Apes), a movie basically about the end of the world, and being told its PG 13, What the Oxford?! There are things that you can’t say or do; you have to do this and that. I mean how can you make an end of the world movie and not expect people to run around swearing for their lifes?

I tell you right now, if a zombie was chasing to kill me, I’d produce more F. U’s than the Wolf of Wall Street.

My question then comes back to this, is academic writing only for academics? If yes, why though? why can’t academic writing be for the everyday man/woman, don’t want to offend anyone?  Yes, you can say it is for everyone but come on, you know what I mean, it’s not everyone that can read the Juggernaut nonsense that we academics write.

The worse thing is that some of the texts/readings that I have read in my lifetime as an academic are absolutely lovely, the ideas in them could be useful to a lot of young people in my field of theatre and performance, but the language in it makes it rather difficult. So, why is it like this? Well I have no clear answer, even if I did, I’d have to reference it, and we all know how annoying that can be; however, in my opinion again something that you can rarely have in academic writing. I think it’s because academics want to be distinct, establish themselves as a different breed of writers, not authors; My god! No, we are, as academics do not write fiction! We write words that can be proven, referenced in reality…yeah fuck off guys!

 The reason I am having this vent out is because 2 years ago when I completed my MA thesis, although very proud of it, in between writing it something got lost. The ideas and thoughts I wanted to share were not clear on paper as they were in my head; well because my words were deemed not academic enough!! That’s popular opinion. Ahhh fuck that. So, I ended up writing jargon which I only understood because I had too, and my supervisor was there to help me understand it.

I love academia, I really do, however that doesn’t mean I cannot question the way it is structured, the way it bends us in its will and fucks us. To be honest it would be chaos, yes, if some rules of academic writing were broken, a disaster would surely come but come on people. Are you really trying to tell me, you are only writing for those who can be able to come to varsity? That’s rather unfair, isn’t access to knowledge the one thing we should give each other in order to grow as people, I certain believe that. Our academic writings, especially all of them dissertations are busy collecting dust in the cloud or libraries until one day someone bumps into it then another 5 years pass. Oh! What?? What was that? People will surely read yours? Because when you wrote your dissertation you filled a gap that was missing? Join the line buddy?! We were also told to fil gaps… the language in that writing will make it difficult for the gap to be filled that’s the issue

I am currently reading a PHD dissertation proposal; honestly I have been out the academic reading game for a while; novels, books and blogs have infected my mind, and when I picked up that proposal I was hella confused, I wanted to call this strange writer and ask ‘what the hell are you saying? Speak English to me’. The idea seems solid but there’s that thing of, how many but only a few handful people will see it. Sir Ken Robinson truly wasn’t lying; academics live from their neck upwards; the body is just a tool to carry their heads to places.

What is the solution for this mess? Uhmm I don’t know really, it’s a long battle with old people; These academic fossils, when they say ‘Jump! You do it, otherwise you’re about to spend a decade trying to complete that dissertation. In conclusion, I don’t have an answer to this question I pose; I am hoping you the reader could perhaps offer an opinion to enlighten me.

What the Homi? Yeah 

Phuma-langa

Phuma-Langa by Mamela

Enacting Culture and Tradition, simplicity; blending symbolism and movement. In what seemed to be a rather abstract work, one cannot help mention that not only beauty but an artistic voice was found. Mamela’s work although I must admit as it began I was questioning were it was going…dancers who were seemingly blind throughout the work, moved and played like little kids.

As the work grew I began to see beyond the mere movements being done, rather I tried to visualise what she was visualising in my head, perhaps piece together my own meaning. I failed miserably… I enjoyed the idea of taking dancers out of dancing context, the idea of using simply movements from culture/tradition turning it to a full work, and interconnecting all that together.

The show was disturbed by load shedding, rather than that taking away from the performance, dancers continued to move. For me, I haven’t seen the original piece but I believe the load shedding perhaps made the work even more better; as it created an intimate moment between the work, the performers and the audience. The audience suddently became part of the work. Again a question I leave at the back of your mind is: can one do justice in performing culture/tradition? I don’t have the answers but what I do have is this. As creator you make your perspective and let us see through your eyes…what we intepret could be entirely different but…that is what art is about, interpretation.

I think the work was lovely, it grew on me as time went on… the costume was perhaps one of the most creative bits in the work. A friend of mine jokingly said “Is it because black people can’t swim” and I thought why not… our culture or the meaning of our culture as black people is being drowned and perhaps we need these tubes worn by the performers to protect it from drowning. I would recommend it to someone who wants to experience creatively abstract work. You will either find it odd or creative